Adult Adoptees Affected by Chemical Dependency

AHA LogoIn collaboration with Adoptees Have Answers (www.aha.mn) , David Bohl will facilitate a group named AAABCD – Adult Adoptees Affected by Chemical Dependency.   AAABCD will provide a safe forum for adoptees aged 18 and older who have been affected by chemical dependency, whether suffering with chemical dependency themselves or witnessing a family member or friend ravaged by addiction.  The group will meet at The Recovery Church, 253 State Street, Saint Paul, MN,  in the Doctor Bob Room the second Monday of every month.

David Bohl is a domestic adoptee directly affected by chemical dependency.  He shares the following philosophy with Adoptees Have Answers:  The power of the narrative–sharing one’s story with others – empowers, inspires, and positively affects all of those involved in the dialogue.  For those of you with 12-Step recovery experience, this message clearly translates into “One alcoholic (addict, etc.) helping another.”

The group will affirm 12 Step principles in its support of members, and much emphasis will be placed on acceptance.  Says Bohl: “Accepting ourselves as we are today – truly loving ourselves – is contingent upon giving up all hope for a better past.”

The group is FREE and open to adult adoptees  18 years and older.   The first support group meeting will be held Monday, December 13th, from 7:00 to 8:00 PM.  For additional information, please contact David Bohl.  Or simply stop by – no reservation needed!

Lindsay Lohan – Please Get Help

Dear Lindsay,

Please , please, PLEASE ask for help.

You’re quoted in this article as saying “Substance abuse is a disease, which unfortunately doesn’t go away overnight.”

NO, LINDSAY! Substance DEPENDENCE is a DISEASE. There is no generally-agreed upon definition of substance ABUSE, but it’s no disease according to the DSM-IV-TR of the American Phycological Association of Substance Abuse:

A. A maladaptive pattern of substance use leading to clinically significant impairment or distress, as manifested by one (or more) of the following, occurring within a 12-month period:

1. Recurrent substance use resulting in a failure to fulfill major role obligations at work, school, or home (e.g., repeated absences or poor work performance related to substance use; substance-related absences, suspensions or expulsions from school; neglect of children or household)

2. Recurrent substance use in situations in which it is physically hazardous (e.g., driving an automobile or operating a machine when impaired by substance use)

3. Recurrent substance-related legal problems (e.g., arrests for substance-related disorderly conduct

4. Continued substance use despite having persistent or recurrent social or interpersonal problems caused or exacerbated by the effects of the substance (e.g., arguments with spouse about consequences of intoxication, physical fights)

B. The symptoms have never met the criteria for Substance Dependence for this class of substance.

SUBSTANCE DEPENDENCE (ADDICTION) is defined as:

A maladaptive pattern of substance use leading to clinically significant impairment or distress, as manifested by three (or more) of the following, occurring any time in the same 12-month period:

1. Tolerance, as defined by either of the following:
(a) A need for markedly increased amounts of the substance to achieve intoxication or the desired effect or
(b) Markedly diminished effect with continued use of the same amount of the substance.

2. Withdrawal, as manifested by either of the following:
(a) The characteristic withdrawal syndrome for the substance or
(b) The same (or closely related) substance is taken to relieve or avoid withdrawal symptoms.

3. The substance is often taken in larger amounts or over a longer period than intended.

4. There is a persistent desire or unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control substance use.

5. A great deal of time is spent in activities necessary to obtain the substance, use the substance, or recover
from its effects.

6. Important social, occupational, or recreational activities are given up or reduced because of substance use.

7. The substance use is continued despite knowledge of having a persistent physical or psychological problem
that is likely to have been caused or exacerbated by the substance.

QUITE A DIFFERENCE!

Lindsay, please stop talking about AA.  Please reach out and ask for help.

New Meeting – Fridays at 9:00 AM Eastern/ 8:00 AM Central/ 7:00 AM Mountain/ 6:00 AM Pacific

Sober24

Please join me for a recovery meeting every Friday at:

9:00 AM Eastern

8:00 AM Central

7:00 AM Mountain

6:00 AM Pacific

See you at Sober24!

Sober 24

Come visit me and others at Sober 24.com

David B. Bohl in Christine Louise Hohlbaum’s The Power of Slow: 101 Ways to Save Time in Our 24/7 World

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This from Amazon.com:

Editorial Reviews

“The Power of Slow is a life-changing book. Far from stating the obvious, Christine Hohlbaum provides new insights and persuasive arguments for reshaping our time and changing our lives for the better. A must read in our over-scheduled world!”–Wendy Walker, author of Social Lives, Four Wives, and Chicken Soup for the Soul – Power Moms

“In the fast-paced world of Blackberrys, Iphones, and Twitter, it’s hard to find one’s footing. In an easy-to-read style, Ms. Hohlbaum has described a process of slowing down that is so very important to our wholeness, balance, and well being. She does so in a poetic and sometimes humorous way. She has captured a heavy topic with a light touch and yet we learn many lessons.  I highly recommend this book to help anyone who wants to stay healthy, sane, and enjoy life more fully.”–Bonnie Michaels, work-life balance expert and author of Solving the Work/Family Puzzle and A Journey of Work-Life Renewal

Product Description

Getting to the heart of our hassled and over-scheduled existence, Christine Louise Hohlbaum cheerfully investigates 101 ways to increase our quality of life and productivity by reevalu ating how we perceive and use time. She claims that everyone has their own personal bank account of time. We cannot control time itself, but we can manage the activities within the time we do have. The Power of Slow gives readers practical, concise directions to change the relationship they have with time and debunks the myths of multitasking, speed, and urgency as the only ways to efficiency.

Recession Proof Thinking

thinkingby David Bohl

Have you been affected by the recession? I surely have, and so have most of us, right? Our economy has gone through some pretty startling changes in the last year or two.

I believe that how we react to these changes will determine whether we prosper or fail, as individuals, and as a nation. Will you wave the white flag and hope that better days are coming, or will you adapt and overcome? I choose the latter. Whether you call it a “down-turn”, “recession”, “slow-down”, or even the dreaded “DEPRESSION”, the truth is that it is up to you to use our changing economy as an opportunity to excel.

Don’t Drink the Kool-Aid.

We’ve all been hearing it in the media. Every other commercial is advertising a “recession proof” this, or a “beat the slow-down” that. The television news has been falling all over themselves covering the recession ad nauseum. If you listened to all this hype you might believe the world was coming to an end. It isn’t.

It’s hard to find quality information on the news these days. What you can easily find is infinite quantities of spin and hype. Don’t focus on the gloom and doom, sensationalist reporting. Stay positive, even if times have gotten tough. You’ll be fine, but you’re probably going to have to make a few changes.

Do Something Different.

The other day, a friend was telling me about his woes. “I’m a union carpenter, and I haven’t worked in six months. I’ve never seen it this bad”, he says. I got the sense that this man was prepared to wait another six months, or more, for things to get better.

In the meantime there are other union carpenters – smarter, more industrious ones who are already making their moves. They are becoming entrepreneurial, and going into business for themselves. They aren’t going to sit and wait for the union to save them, they are going to make things happen now. These are the kinds of folks who will prosper through difficult and changing times while others shake their heads and blame “the recession”.

Diversify:

When money gets tight, we need to re-think our business model. Say, for example, your hours have been cut. You went from 40 to 30 hours per week. It is probably time to find a source of supplemental income. Pick a skill or a talent that you have and market it.

Say, for example, you play the guitar. If you’ve been at it for a while, then you probably have knowledge and information that is worth money. Put an ad on Craigslist, or something similar, and start giving guitar lessons. Get yourself a few good customers and you’ll be right back where you were in terms of income, and you’ll be doing something different and presumably more enjoyable in the process.

If you’re not sure what to do, then make a list of your skills. We all have them – things like: gardening, tennis, piano, second language, computer, etc. Now put a possible way to earn money next to each skill. Go from there, and you’ll be on your way to leveraging your individual skills to earn extra cash.

Most of us believe that we have made something out of ourselves through hard work, and smart decision making. In this country we have to earn what we have. We aren’t born entitled, and there are no free rides. The economy has made some pretty tough circumstances for most of us. Nobody is denying that, but, it is important to recognize that we are dealing with exactly that – circumstances.

I will never surrender and become a victim of circumstance. We will all persevere and meet these challenges as long as we keep things in their proper perspective. Tune out the hype and negativity, get back to the basics of hard work and opportunism. Let the tough times weed out the defeatists, and we and our economy will come through this recession stronger than ever.

What to Do When There’s Nothing to Do

what-to-doHave you ever woken up on a Saturday morning and said to yourself or a family member, “What are we going to do today? There’s nothing to do…”? Or it’s a holiday week off from work or school and you’re out of your routine and you ask the same question, “What’s there to do? I’m bored.”

Personally, I’ve never been bored a day in my life, but for some people, if they’re out of their normal routine, say on a weekend, holiday, or vacation, they get stuck and lose their momentum. They may not be thinking creatively of what they can come up with to do. Or they may have a pretty simple life of work and the basic home life. Or they keep so busy at their jobs, that there’s no time to develop hobbies or outside interests, so when they do have that rare free time, they don’t know what to do with themselves.

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You Can Either Worry or Be Grateful–Not Both

DifferencesIf you consider yourself a “worry wart” it may not be your fault. You probably grew up raised on worry. It was a common theme of those raised in the post WWII era. If our parents weren’t worried about money, they worried about our getting into an accident or getting good grades in school or you name it.

I once heard a great definition of worry: it’s negative goal setting. That’s because worry is always about the future, and none of us can really predict the future. It’s such wasted energy that could be constructively used to make the present a lot better. Reign in your overactive imagination. Imagine instead using the energy you would have expended on worry to envision a positive future.

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What’s Your Living Style?

living

Type the words ‘living style’ and any combination of other related keywords into Google and you get a list of sites about home design, fashion, cars, pets and all the newest trends associated with them. These are the accumulated trappings that reflect our lifestyle. Lifestyle is the visible evidence of our preferences, our tastes, our wealth. So what kind of question is “What’s your living style”? And why give it your attention?

Well, the word ‘living’ is the present participle of the verb ‘live’. It suggests activity and interactivity. What we are doing, experiencing, living, now. If you’re like most working folk in mainstream society your present reality is a balancing act between work stress, family responsibilities, friendships and untold other obligations. And if you’re like most basically stable but somewhat frazzled folk, the prolonged strain often leaves you with a vague but troublesome sense of disconnect from your soul’s center.

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Taking Your Networking Online

by David Bohl

The practice of networking is one of those essential elements of life we often take for granted, since we do it naturally. Essentially, I see networking as connecting with people, exchanging ideas, and building relationships. Since early man, networking has been a practical tool for forming alliances with others to trade and share resources. Today networking can be a business marketing tool or a way for people to connect for social purposes.

I know some businesses that use networking as their exclusive marketing vehicle. It’s a highly effective way for people to build relationships for mutual benefit to either do business directly or to refer business. We’ve all heard the saying, “it’s not what you know but who you know.” Well, networking gives us an opportunity to meet those who can be influential to our business. And I’m sure you’ve also heard that people like to do business with people they “know, like, and trust.” Through networking, you can build the “know, like, and trust” factor as you meet and work with people on an ongoing basis.

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