Are You Too Comfortable in Your Discomfort Zone?
By David B. Bohl | September 8, 2008 | 5 Responses
We all live in a framework of ideas, beliefs, and actions known as our comfort zone. It’s what we know and what we’ve always done. But when we get to a point of discomfort either because we’re bored, unhappy, or just ready to spread our wings and move to the next level, our comfort zone becomes our discomfort zone. And if we don’t do anything to move beyond our self-imposed barriers, we become too comfortable in our discomfort zone. At this point it’s no longer a comfort zone, but more of a familiar zone.
As human beings if we’re not growing, we’re stagnant. And if we want to grow, our comfort zone will hold us back. So we’re always needing to stretch the limits further and further out. There’s no growth if we stay inside our comfort zone. When you stay where you are, we call that being stuck. Maybe you’re unconsciously stuck, that is, you don’t realize you’re unhappy, because you’re numb and have become complacent staying where you are. Maybe you’re consciously stuck because you don’t know what to do to move beyond your comfort zone. You’ve tried different strategies but nothing seems to move you to the next level.
Now here’s the paradox. In order to grow beyond your comfort zone which has now become uncomfortable, you have to take actions that make you even more uncomfortable. See if you keep doing the safe actions you’ve been doing, they won’t move you past your limits, and that’s why nothing’s been working. To stretch beyond your previous limits, you have to stretch yourself, and sometimes that feels uncomfortable. You may be doing something different from what you did before but it’s still safe and comfortable. Now, to stretch, you might have to take risks, experience embarrassment, speak out, get rejected, and even fail.
And, you also have to stretch and change your mindset. That might mean seeing yourself in a different light, seeing yourself as the person you want to become. You have to weigh the cost of staying where you are vs. the rewards of moving out of your safe space.
Here’s an example of what I’m talking about. Let’s say you want a promotion at work which would stretch you beyond the work you’ve done before. If you stay in your comfort zone, you’ll do nothing and hope someday you’ll get promoted. If you are willing to be uncomfortable you may ask someone in human resources to let you know of any openings, and when you hear of one, you would call the person doing the hiring and ask for an interview. Or you would even look for a job in another firm where you could advance further. All these actions might feel risky, scary, and like a big stretch. But when you weigh the cost of staying at a dead-end job against moving ahead in your career, you get to decide if you want to be uncomfortable–for a little while. It’s not forever, just until you get to the next comfort zone.
The choice, of course, is always yours. Are you too comfortable in your discomfort zone? Or are you willing to be a little more uncomfortable for a little while longer, to reach a new place of greater growth and a new level of comfort?
Copyright 2008 David Bohl and SlowDownFast.com. All rights reserved.
About the Author:
Husband, father, friend, Life Coach and Lifestyle Designer David B. Bohl is the creator of Slow Down FAST at www.slowdownfast.com.
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Categories: Success Strategies, Self Improvement, Productivity, Personal Development, Life Coach, Slow Down Fast, Lifestyle Design, Life Coaching, Attitude, Motivation, Knowing Yourself, Creativity, Change, What Do You Want?, Fear, Fulfillment, Inspiration, Happiness, Goals, Daily Living
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5 Responses to “Are You Too Comfortable in Your Discomfort Zone?”
Comments
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September 8th, 2008 at 11:49 am
I found this post especially interesting considering my next step in life. In 22 days, my husband (Justin) and I leave (09-30-08) to backpack to various countries around the world for a year or so.
As we have been planning for our adventure we have been updating a blog. www.nomadbackpackers.com We would love to have other opinions, ideas, encouragement, advice, helpful tips, and more left as comments.
Thanks,
Natalie
September 8th, 2008 at 11:52 am
Natalie,
Good for you! Sounds like a great adventure.
David
September 10th, 2008 at 10:48 am
This is a great article. I needed to move outside my comfort zone in a big way and I took a leap into the unknown and yeah it was terrifying but so worth it.
Facing challenges and pushing beyond my comfort zone has been a mixed bag and certainly not easy because envitably there are sacrifices to be made along the way as well (no pain, no gain.)
With your help David I’m so glad I took that leap. As a result I’m continuing to push against all self-imposed barriers. Basically, if my mind says no I just do it! Not recklessly but consciously.
My advice to anyone feeling the need to move outside their comfort zone is get some excellent support if you need it from a great coach and do it!
It’s the best thing I ever did!!
September 10th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
Susanna,
I’m delighted for you and humbled by your kind thoughts.
Excellent advice. Personal development and self-help certainly mean that we’re focused on growing ourselves, but these terms say nothing about having to go it alone!
David
September 10th, 2008 at 4:06 pm
I love when you talk about stagnating growth by getting stuck in our comfort zone. Change is such an uncomfortable thing to experience, but the results CANNOT be achieved any other way. I’d like to think of how iron feels when it is being worked to become steel.
Talk about a potentially painful process!