When you are trying to keep up with the daily grind, it is sometimes easy to lose sight of the fact that you reap what you sow in your personal relationships. If it is intimacy you desire, you must first be able to inspire it. If you desire friendship, you must first be able to bestow it. If you seek equality and fairness, then those qualities must work both ways.

Relationships are like flowers. They need sunshine and tending. They need to be looked after. They need attention. Without these things, the relationship will grow stale and wither away, like a flower dying on a vine.

As a relationship blooms, it becomes the priority in each person’s life. Both people put in the effort to make time for each other, to pay attention to each other, and to constantly let the other person know how much they care. There is tremendous happiness in each others’ company, and the relationship brings a great sense of fulfillment.

But as the relationship matures, the struggles of day to day life gradually creep back in, like weeds growing in the garden. At first they may not even be noticeable, but if left unattended, they can slowly take over and choke out the flower.

1. Take the Time for a Loving Gesture Read Post

Sometimes in our haste to get things done, we forget to take our time and make sure they are done well. Trying to hurry through a project without giving much thought to the consequences is likely to result in shoddy work and a large number of errors. Not only does your reputation as a professional suffer from such work, but in the end it could end up costing you precious time as well. You may find yourself revisiting old projects, trying to undo or repair mistakes that were made the first time through.

Rather than put yourself in this position and risk tarnishing your reputation in the process, slow down and take the time to ensure your projects are completed right the first time around. The added time it takes to be thorough is a small price to pay in comparison to the price shoddy work can cost you in the long run. This could be of particular concern if you work as an independent contractor, and are able to charge higher rates due to the high quality of your work. Performing rushed jobs could cause your quality to slip, which could result in fewer sales or the need to reduce your prices so they are more in alignment with your local competition. Read Post

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In ancient Greek mythology, Persephone was kidnapped and held captive in Hades, the early Greek version of hell. She was eventually rescued, but only on the condition she would take the King of Hades who bore the same name as her husband, and agree to live part of the year in the Underworld. Each year Persephone would escape to sunshine and life, only to be cast back into the depths of Hades in order to fulfill her agreement.

Life is very much like the cycles of Persephone’s life. We experience periods of great joy and fulfillment, only to suffer a loss and be cast into the depths of hell. The important thing to remember is that the human spirit is resilient and strong, and when it appears that all hope has vanished, there really is a light shining at the end of the tunnel. All you have to do is open your eyes to it, and you will emerge stronger and wiser.

1. Everyone has Visited the Darkness

Think back to the most difficult time in your life. Remember that you are not alone in your experience, and everyone walking this planet has endured their darkest days. Most likely, something was learned from the experience, even if only the knowledge that you are strong in mind and spirit. Life gives us trials in order to teach us lessons we cannot learn otherwise. We are also given no cross to bear that is too great for us to handle, even if it seems so at the time. Read Post

For one time only, I’m offering the Intensive Empowerment System workshop FR.EE !!!

Do you have a personal plan for success?

Most people today are completely overwhelmed by everything that life throws at them on a daily basis. Because the boundaries between work and personal life have become so blurred, we become lost, confused and derailed from our goals.

Personal success is attained in gradual increments by setting and achieving goals.

At SlowDownFast.com, we have developed a comprehensive, customizable and highly flexible program which addresses such a need: The Slow Down Fast Intensive Empowerment System (IES).

The Slow Down FAST Intensive Empowerment System helps individuals achieve their goals.

Here’s how you can benefit from this program:

• You’ll realign yourself with your purpose.
• You’ll once again connect with your values and talents - and this will ignite your passion and drive to succeed.
• You will leverage your own, unique learning style for quicker retention and more rapid advancement.
• You will be empowered in your personal life, which in turn fuels you professionally and brings you greater commitment and dedication on the job.

For one time only, I’m offering the Intensive Empowerment System workshop FR.EE Read Post

Many people go through life in pursuit of happiness and fulfillment, without ever having a clear picture of what those things mean to them. Each person has unique ideas regarding what constitutes happiness, based largely on that person’s individual values and past experiences. In order to be truly happy, you must first determine what it is that makes you content, fulfilled, and satisfied. Only then can you take steps to achieve your own personal state of happiness.

In order to determine what you want out of life to give you a sense of fulfillment or contentment, try the following exercises.

1. Find out Where You are Stuck

Ask yourself what aspects of your life make you feel like you are in a rut or that you feel need to be changed. In doing so, try to determine how long you have felt you were stuck in these particular habits, and ask yourself why you have not yet changed them. Read Post

From my article Realizing Success Through Empowerment at Dumb Little Man:

“So many times when things go badly in our lives we find ourselves wondering how we ended up in such a bad situation, or who is to blame. These are self-defeating mindsets that limit our ability to recover, or to succeed.

Instead of developing a defeatist attitude when something goes awry, try to adjust to a mindset that allows you to empower yourself. Empowerment, in turn, leads to greater success. It allows you to learn from your mistakes, be thankful for your accomplishments, and move on.

The next time you find yourself in a mess and wondering how or why you got there, try looking at some of the more positive aspects of your particular situation.”

Read the rest of Realizing Success Through Empowerment.

Your subjective well-being is a measure of how you personally feel about your own levels of happiness, satisfaction and emotional health - in short, your own evaluation of your quality of life. Having a high SWB means that you are happy with your life; you experience your life as being predominately positive and unpleasant feelings are uncommon and generally situational and temporary in nature. On the other hand, someone with a low SWB rates their life as dreary, stagnant or unpleasant, and considers happiness, joy and pleasure to be uncommon and mostly transient sensations.

According to Ed Diener, et al, in their paper “Recent Findings on Subjective Well-Being” (http://www.psych.uiuc.edu/~ediener/hottopic/paper1.html), there are three components to subjective well-being: Satisfaction, pleasant affect, and low levels of unpleasant affect. Satisfaction is a measure of how satisfied you are with your life. Pleasant affect refers to pleasant or positive emotions - joy, happiness, pleasure, love, pride, etc. And unpleasant affect refers to unpleasant emotions - guilt, anger, unhappiness, helplessness, etc. The sum of these factors, as you see them, makes up your overall perception of you subjective well-being.

Having a high SWB contributes immensely to your state of mental and physical health, you’re ability to cope with change and crisis, and your enjoyment of life in general. Here are a few ways you can boost your own personal happiness, and improve your chances of enjoying a long, happy life. Read Post

I’m presenting tomorrow at the Biz Tech Expo in Milwaukee. Topic: Personal Development in a Professional World.

Here are the details:

Someone posed an intriguing question to me recently. They asked me “how to make someone’s day in ten minutes.”

I thought about this for a few moments, and then I realized that Mick Jagger has the answer. Come to their emotional rescue.

When I say “emotional rescue,” it sounds like there’s a crisis happening. Certainly, it’s a given that if someone is freaking out or having a meltdown, they might need some attention from you. But that’s not what I’m referring to here.

I’m actually referring to something more subtle - the little things people say and do that indicate that may be needing something at this time. It’s so easy to get caught up in the busyness of our lives, and overlook these subtle cues from people. But they’re there, aren’t they? Noticing others, relating and being there for each other, is what life is really all about.

When we overlook the little things - the courtesy, the attention, and respect that other people deserve from us - this leads to bigger things. Maybe it seems like life is fine, we have our friends, our stuff, and all is well. But is it really?

Many people today have turned to drugs and therapy to alleviate whatever pain or emptiness they’re experiencing. When doctors offer us prescriptions to help shake feelings of loneliness, inadequacy, swinging moods, anger, and other imbalance… this somehow validates our issues, wouldn’t you say? Being handed a bottle of pills confirms what we’re feeling is real.

But what if we also believed that the source of unhappiness, is not only real, but curable in a very real, natural, and human way? Real, meaning through our own reality - the people who we come into contact and connect with. The friendships and relationships we cultivate.

Every human being has emotional needs. The actual need may vary depending on the person, the circumstance, and your role in their life. The intensity will vary as well. But if there is one thing that we all crave these days, but maybe we’re not getting so much of as we did in the past… it’s emotional validation and support.

Who can you rescue emotionally, in just ten minutes? Read Post