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Editorial Reviews

“The Power of Slow is a life-changing book. Far from stating the obvious, Christine Hohlbaum provides new insights and persuasive arguments for reshaping our time and changing our lives for the better. A must read in our over-scheduled world!”–Wendy Walker, author of Social Lives, Four Wives, and Chicken Soup for the Soul – Power Moms

“In the fast-paced world of Blackberrys, Iphones, and Twitter, it’s hard to find one’s footing. In an easy-to-read style, Ms. Hohlbaum has described a process of slowing down that is so very important to our wholeness, balance, and well being. She does so in a poetic and sometimes humorous way. She has captured a heavy topic with a light touch and yet we learn many lessons.  I highly recommend this book to help anyone who wants to stay healthy, sane, and enjoy life more fully.”–Bonnie Michaels, work-life balance expert and author of Solving the Work/Family Puzzle and A Journey of Work-Life Renewal

Product Description

Getting to the heart of our hassled and over-scheduled existence, Christine Louise Hohlbaum cheerfully investigates 101 ways to increase our quality of life and productivity by reevalu ating how we perceive and use time. She claims that everyone has their own personal bank account of time. We cannot control time itself, but we can manage the activities within the time we do have. The Power of Slow gives readers practical, concise directions to change the relationship they have with time and debunks the myths of multitasking, speed, and urgency as the only ways to efficiency.

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Type the words ‘living style’ and any combination of other related keywords into Google and you get a list of sites about home design, fashion, cars, pets and all the newest trends associated with them. These are the accumulated trappings that reflect our lifestyle. Lifestyle is the visible evidence of our preferences, our tastes, our wealth. So what kind of question is “What’s your living style”? And why give it your attention?

Well, the word ‘living’ is the present participle of the verb ‘live’. It suggests activity and interactivity. What we are doing, experiencing, living, now. If you’re like most working folk in mainstream society your present reality is a balancing act between work stress, family responsibilities, friendships and untold other obligations. And if you’re like most basically stable but somewhat frazzled folk, the prolonged strain often leaves you with a vague but troublesome sense of disconnect from your soul’s center.

If this describes your typical day, it might be time to examine, even define your living style and get it under control. Shape your inner life space so that the living is good.

Most of us think in terms of living a long, full term life of about 80-85 years. In that span we go through various seasons. Each one brings its own set of concerns, challenges and joys. We only get one go round with each, and we are responsible to experience each one fully. But because we are human and driven to constantly learn, improve and grow, we’ll push that instinctual ambition to the limit of our known available resources. And resources we have–to the point of information overload.

So how do you marry your frenzied life with all its necessary daily activities with the season in which we now live, to create a more balanced, more satisfying living style? Consider your present season. What about this season is worth cherishing? And what within this season would you like to accomplish that is compatible with what you cherish?

Deep Style Lite

Are you young, unattached, and loving your freedom? Want to study, travel, or a combination of the two? Then maybe rather than allowing a new relationship develop–just because the opportunity presents itself, you put it on hold. Emotional ties can wait. But maybe your freedoms can’t. Respect your new found focus and remain true to it in the overall scheme of your dreams. Save for airfare rather than blow it on a city weekend. Instead, spend that weekend immersed in plans and activities that support your present passion. Your style of living has suddenly taken a shape appropriate to the conditions of your season.

Do you want to adopt a healthier living style? Better eating habits, a regular exercise routine? You’ve taken the obvious steps. Emptied the freezer of ice cream, joined a gym, changed your bed time to allow more sleep. But unless you have seriously considered the pattern of your living style, your initial efforts will be compromised.

Have you closed the chapter (temporarily) on Wednesday night poker and beer in favor of an evening with someone who can encourage your efforts? Are you still shopping for shoes on your lunch break, when the extra money could go toward healthy groceries? Did you earlier in the year commit to journaling in the morning, but now find it impossible?

The conflicting priorities demand concerted planning. Envision the sacrifices and make the adjustments before they are staring you in the face. Then give yourself permission to presently and fully engage in a living style that will ferry you through to success.

The principles of creating a living style apply to all seasons. A newly awakened concern for social justice, a political movement, the environment, all call for modifications. How can you really live with concern for sea life when you continue to indiscriminately use plastic?

When you make the right adjustments, your energy is brought into synch with your values, and the subconscious conflicts that plague you are released to create more forward momentum. This will show up in newly formed relationships or a more tightly crafted budget to support your goals.

Seasons of motherhood, fatherhood, spiritual exploration, educational growth, building a house, learning your family heritage, reading every book by Tolstoy, are all seasons. By identifying what you treasure within these seasons, and linking them to the parallel activities of daily life, you will create an integrated inner landscape and a harmonious, comfortable living style.

NEWSFLASH: I’ve added another chapter to my life by joining C.A.S.T. Recovery, a Los Angeles based outpatient drug rehab program which specializes in designing highly individualized recovery plans with appropriate professionals to support a client’s health, accountability, and success.

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We are told to strive for unattainable lifestyles and to model ourselves after unrealistic, airbrushed models.

Sometimes you need to step back from this virtual reality and ponder what life is really about. Will that Mercedes or those anti-anxiety medications really make you happier, or are they only temporary solutions to deeper issues? Examine these five myths about how you should be living your life and start living the way you want to live.

Myth 1: Material Things Prove Your Worth

Someone once said, “One reason it’s so hard to save money is that our neighbors are always buying something we can’t afford.” Keeping up with the Joneses is certainly no way to live, and the desire to do so stems from a belief that material things prove your worth. Extravagant clothing, houses, and cars oftentimes serve as status symbols in today’s society, but when it comes down to it, what you have in your heart and mind is worth much more than what you’ve got in your wallet. Furthermore, comparing yourself financially to your friends and family will only cause envy and strife. Remember that while luxuries may be enjoyable, they don’t make you who you are.

Myth 2: You Should Always Take an Expert’s Opinion at Face Value

How many times have you taken your car in for a simple oil change, only to be told you need hundreds of dollars worth of repairs in other areas? Have you taken the mechanic’s word for it and shelled out the cash or gone in for a second opinion elsewhere? We tend to rely on experts for advice, whether they are doctors, lawyers, financial consultants, or repairmen, but you can’t forget that even though they are experts, they still don’t know everything. You always retain the power to do your own research or seek out another form of advice. You may find that separate individuals offer different yet complementary opinions that allow you to shape a more informed decision on the issue you are having.

Myth 3: When in Doubt, Medicate

It’s hard to make it through a 2-minute commercial break without seeing an advertisement for some sort of prescription drug. The prescription drug industry has exploded in the past decade, and Zoloft, Prozac, and Ritalin are now part of most Americans’ vocabulary. While there is something to be said for the positive benefits medications have to offer, they are certainly not quick fix on the road to happiness. Before asking your doctor about the latest mood-altering drug you saw on television or in a magazine, consider seeking therapy and using self-improvement strategies to alter your moods instead. Even if prescription drugs are a feasible option for your treatment plan, it’s important to remember that they are not a cure-all. Healing takes time and a repertoire of varying strategies in order to truly come about.

Myth 4: It’s Hip to Be Forever Young

The world today is filled with Peter Pans – adults who don’t want to grow up. Whether they are lacking in emotional maturity or in wrinkles, growing old has become a faux pas for a lot of people. Don’t get the wrong idea. It’s great to feel young at heart and to be physically fit, but it’s possible to do so and still age gracefully. Aging with class involves learning from your past. What’s the point of a life long-lived if you want to act like a child and look like one, too? Gray hair, laugh lines, and a cultivated point of view are things to be embraced, not shunned.

Myth 5: You Can Do It All

Society tends to tell us that multitasking and the ability to juggle lots of things at once is a good thing, but when you have too many things in the air, something is bound to get dropped. Ambition is a good thing, but you have to know when enough is enough. Yes, it’s possible to be a wife, a mother, a businesswoman, and the best baker at the church bazaar, but it’s also okay to say no when your best friend asks you to help her plan a charity gala. When you take on more than you can handle, the quality of your projects often suffers. Don’t feel pressured to be a yes-man. Even the best of us can’t do it all.

There are so many self-improvement blogs, magazines, and websites out there these days, everyone has an opinion on the way you should be living your life. It’s important not to focus on the myths flooding the media but to analyze your situations carefully and live the way that is right for you.

NEWSFLASH: I’ve added another chapter to my life by joining C.A.S.T. Recovery, a Los Angeles based national outpatient drug rehab program which specializes in designing highly individualized recovery plans with appropriate professionals to support a client’s health, accountability, and success.

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Here are the 12 Most-Read Numbered Posts in 2008 at Slow Down FAST:

12.    5 Tips for Becoming a Better Listener
11.    5 Qualities of Successful Relationships
10.    6 Ways for Effecting Change in Your Life
9.      6 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Busting Out of the Rat Race
8.      5 Signs It’s Time to Slow Down Fast
7.      6 Ways to Be a Friend Without Involving Money, Gifts or Obligation
6.      5 Ways to Reconnect to Your Inner Child
5.      10 Great Productivity Web Sites
4.      5 Signs You’re a Pleaser and What to Do About It
3.      5 Simple Tricks To Make You Smarter
2.      8 Essential Ingredients to Master Your Time
1.      The Causes and Cures of Procrastination

Thank you all for your support throughout the year, and best wishes in all your future endeavors.

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So, after 700+ posts in 2008, I’m publishing the 12 Most Read Posts at Slow Down FAST so we can all get a jump on the new year.

Thank you all for your support throughout the year.

Here they are:

1. The Causes and Cures of Procrastination
2. Mindhacks: 5 Ways to Increase Creativity, Productivity and Intelligence
3. How to Overcome the #1 Fear: Public Speaking
4. 8 Essential Ingredients to Master Your Time
5. Do Not Wage Psychological Warfare
6. Stuck in a Rut? Fire Up Your Creativity with These 7 Steps
7. What Are You Passionate About?
8. See How Easily You Can Handle Change
9. How to Maintain Professional Boundaries
10. 5 Simple Tricks To Make You Smarter
11. 5 Signs You’re a Pleaser and What to Do About It
12. From Greedy to Grateful – Appreciating What You Have

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Amazingly, the holidays are upon us again. It feels as though this time of year comes so fast, turns our lives upside down and is over before we know it. Sometimes it’s hard to be fully present in the moment when we’re overwhelmed and stressed about gift giving, tons of parties to attend, and juggling our families through it all. It helps to step back and take it all in. Slow Down and enjoy the holidays.

Giving is better than receiving…

Make time for others. The good deeds you do will not only help others but really allow you to experience the true meaning of the holidays. Why not volunteer at a soup kitchen, organize a toy drive for underprivileged children or even make time at your child’s school for fun activities? Even simple gestures like baking cookies for your elderly neighbors or inviting those without families to visit during the holidays can be ways to give to others what they would have missed this year.

Peace on earth…

Do you and your neighbor have an ongoing feud concerning your property line or an overgrown tree? Do you not really know your neighbors at all because you work crazy hours? Haven’t seen the in laws in some time, and you’re sort of happy about that? Make the extra effort. Shovel your neighbor’s driveway as a peace offering. Introduce yourself to your new neighbors with a gift of cigars or homemade brownies. Extend the olive branch and offer to host at your home this year. Realize that you are also an x-factor that can change your relationships.

Goodwill toward man…

Spread the good cheer! A positive attitude in your professional and personal life can definitely bring out the best in people. Make the extra effort to find the positive angle in situations that may not appear to be so great. Involve your family and coworkers in decision making. Find what it is that they want to do and attempt to incorporate it into “the plan.” If your workmate feels that his approach toward a client or situation might be the best way, let him try before (or even IF) you need to use your own approach. Have your children decide on, and then plan for, a family outing. Enjoy spending time together and focus on just being with them, rather than whatever is on your holiday to-do list!.

Let it snow…

Stock up your cupboards with the fixings for holiday treats and cocoa. Enjoy the season… enjoy the snow and the early evenings. Go sledding and skating… warm up in front of the fire, and spend time with those that you love. Pull out the seasonal favorites: It’s a Wonderful Life, A Christmas Carol, The Santa Clause… plan a movie night with your spouse or even the whole family! Pop popcorn, have a few hot toddies… find simple reasons to enjoy the season!

There’s No Place Like Home…

For the holidays, make an effort to get together with loved ones, near and far. Sure, the traffic might be terrific and maybe it’s been so long that you’d just as soon stay home. But it’s important to make the effort — especially with family, as they are the roots of who you are and where you came from. Reconnecting with cousins, aunts, uncles, nephews and nieces can be a refreshing and fun alternative to your daily grind.

Slow down and enjoy the holidays. Though they do come once a year… make this year count!

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“I finally learned that you cannot help people unless they really need help, are willing to be helped, want you to help them and ask you to help them. Even then, you can only help them to help themselves.” ~ Vincent Collins

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No one seems to realize the power of honesty. You are only as good as your word. No one will believe or trust you if you play verbal games. Honesty is morally right and efficient. And ultimately, always the best policy.

So when they are caught with their pants down and are backed into a corner, the slippery politicians come up with phony apologies. But, bad apologies are worse than no apology at all. In our personal and professional lives, we wouldn’t stand for this. We wouldn’t let people off the hook with bad apologies. Once your friend, partner, or business associate is caught in a lie or bad apology after the fact, your trust factor is severely reduced!

Saying the words when apologizing is often not enough. For an apology to be acceptable, you have to mean it and show it; and it should contain the 3 Rs:

Responsibility – the person must take responsibility for making the mistake and for having done harm. Admitting you are wrong is the first step in making an acceptable apology. If you live in a world of blame and complain, you are not living in the world of responsibility. Ultimately the truth will come out, so why not save the guilt and loss of trust by admitting your wrong-doing and moving on?

There’s more to an apology than just saying, “I’m sorry.” You need to swallow your pride and say, “I know I messed up.” That’s difficult for most people to admit, because we seem to strive for perfection–that ever unreachable spot on the ever distant horizon. If you truly want to make amends, acknowledge the action you took that may have hurt, humiliated, or disrespected the other person.

Of course, the level of responsibility you take in order to make your apology may vary based on the circumstances. There may be contributing factors from both parties that need to be sorted out before you both can move forward. An example might be that John is always late for meetings, and after the third time finally offers an apology to his boss, Tom. However, if Tom sent an e-mail with the meeting time and it didn’t get to John, there are contributing factors on both sides.

Remorse – they have to sincerely feel badly that their actions caused you pain. How do you demonstrate your regret or remorse for the action that you are apologizing for? First, when you take responsibility and admit your error, the person you harmed will see that you are being sincere. The injured party wants to see that the person apologizing is really sorry for the transgression they committed.

The way you deliver your apology–in person rather than by phone, letter, or e-mail–can also make a difference in the apology being accepted. If you’re apologizing, be straightforward and humble about it. Provide an explanation rather than an excuse, and don’t trivialize the situation by laughing or joking while asking for forgiveness.

You want to show the offended party that you are remorseful about what you have done. Suppose the situation entailed your forgetting to take in your neighbor’s mail while they were on vacation. You may have had good reason, like working long hours at work, or you might have merely forgotten. You would show your remorse by saying how sorry you were, admitting you messed up, and professing that you will do much better next time–if there is one.

Restitution – offer a remedy and take specific action, to right the wrong that’s been perpetrated. Aside from asking for forgiveness, you also need to face the consequences of your actions. If what you did was truly hurtful, make amends and clean up your act. You must demonstrate that you don’t intend to repeat the offense.

The best course would be to follow up the apology with positive action. For example, if you accidentally erased an important file at work, promise to retype the whole document and update your back up system — and then stick to your word. Whatever you do, don’t postpone apologizing. It is most effective when done within a relatively short time of the offending action. Otherwise, you’re living a lie and you’ll create stress on your relationship. Rather than making excuses or being evasive, swallow your pride and offer your apology. Then together, figure out what you can do to make things right between you.

Without these 3 Rs, the politician, friend, business partner, or even you, are not being honest and not being forthright with an apology. If you want to accept an apology and you want your apologies accepted, follow this simple formula.

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Don’t know what to do?

You can tell the intentions of those close to you. If your boss is tirelessly waving that promotion under your nose but never seems to deliver no matter how hard you work, do not feel guilty about leaving work early to spend time with your family. Don’t schedule lunch with your girlfriend anymore if she can’t seem to find the time to show up. Do not put yourself into the situation of being disappointed when it is in some people’s character to disappoint you and countless others. Your local representative promised lower taxes and less government involvement but the record shows the exact opposite…vote that politician out of office! Not as difficult as it might seem given that the record is there for public scrutiny.

Wonder if all absolute fact has been lost in today’s world?

I’m amazed by how difficult it is to figure out what the candidates in today’s presidential election stand for… especially with the press pushing their “unbiased” agenda. The only real solution is to not only expose yourself to all coverage (national media, cable television, talk radio, newspapers, and political journals) but to also do your own research. By cruising the candidates’ websites, you can see the consistencies and inconsistencies in their rhetoric.

It’s also interesting to see the difference in news coverage. If you watch NBC, you’ll see constant attacks on John McCain and Sarah Palin and glossing over the facts with Barack Obama and Joe Biden. When listening to Sean Hannity or Rush Limbaugh, you will see accusations thrown at the Obama-Biden ticket and more positive spin towards the republicans.

It is a difficult task, but siphoning through the nonsense for the consistent message can be done. The basics in their intentions can be seen in their parties’ politics. If you’re looking for a candidate who supports public welfare programs through higher spending and tougher government regulations, you know where to find him. If you are looking for a candidate who promotes less government involvement and the “take care of yourself first” mentality, you know where to find him, too. The trick is weeding through the issues (economy, foreign policy, healthcare, etc.) and pushing away the none-issues.

Ignore what people say and watch what they do.

Although history isn’t always an accurate guide in determining what will happen in the future, it’s a very precise indicator of what people will do. Yes, people do change, but you won’t take notice of it until you see the change in their actions. The friend that is constantly disappointing you might take notice when you stop inviting her to do things with you and mend her ways. Your boss will notice if you call him out on your constant delivery and his constant lack thereof. Check out the bills that your congressperson did and did not vote for…you might find pork barrel spending was the reason for their Yeah or Nay vote. If not, you can still hold them accountable by voicing your opinions to their office and staff.

Look for the best in everybody – IN THEIR ACTIONS TOWARDS YOU. You might not initially like what you find, but sometimes, if you wait long enough, people will surprise and impress you. Be patient.

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